Northenden.NET - Officially Manchester's Best Website
The Church at Midnight
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Hello to you people out there, Big Vern here, writing to you from Kenworthy Lane. Despite the lack of staff and funding we're once again having to endure, it's time we updated the site instead of letting it sink into disrepair. I appreciate that without my guidance some of you people out there have lost your way in life, but if we're being honest, not much of any note has happened in the village since you were last enlightened by my words of wisdom. The biggest event is the closure of the Tatton Arms. Come on people let's face it, it's been deserted for decades - in fact, the last time I went was the KFM roadshow in 1984!
Work on the Mobil flats is almost complete. No action at the Church Inn or Barrow Motors. Northenden Labour club have started a self-congratulatory website containing at best, little of any consequence, and at worst, a lot of schemes purloined from the Lib Dems masquerading as attempts to relieve you people of all your cash. By the way, I have recently been informed that a lesser-known political pressure group from Cheshire is to be introduced into the Manchester area. I am told it is called "The Conservative Party". Now we pride ourselves on keeping you people up to date so if anyone has heard of this group, or has any information at all then can they please send me an email.
Complaints are flooding in about the closure of the British Legion at Royle Green (admittedly, mostly from Big Ern who once again is having to suffer the "slappers cacophany", in other words he has to travel to Benchill for his karaoke night). Unfortunately the involvement of committee members in the closure of the Legion has led to a disagreement between themselves and big Ern, who is in charge of paying Vinnie to put the site on air. Consequently the committee members who've been funding the whole thing are no longer doing so - and there's a rumour going around that the committee also have designs on our domain name. So despite my brother's indiscretion we're keeping Northenden.Net going anyway – with the aid of a whip round we had in Gatley. Nice one.
December 2007 on www.northenden.net
- Community Update - Latest local developments
- Northenden.NET Diary from the moaning old duffers (journalists)
- We break into the derelict Tatton Arms and discover an increase in the number of customers
- Northenden Committee launch an attack on the twin towers (no, these towers are in Gatley)
- More than just a huge traffic jam? We review the reinstated Farmers' Market
- Loads more riveting stories from your favourite Mancunian suburb!